Happy 4th - er, 5th!

Last year on July 4th i drank a pitcher of mojitos at a cookout. The next day I found out I was pregnant with Sam. Whoops. He does smell just a tad minty now that I think about it.  Anyway, I look at Sam now and think back at last 4th of July weekend.  Getting that positive test brought out a bunch of emotions for both Phil and I. We were definitely excited, but the excitement was trumped by worry and sadness. Barely 3 months had passed since losing Henry. I was definitely no where near back to any state or normalcy (I'm still working on that one!). Everything was fresh and raw. Thankfully those feelings of worry and sadness were short lived. I was getting a second chance to bring life into this world. What was better than that? I was no longer going to allow myself to feel worry about the pregnancy.  What good would that do?

And now, one year later, I have this handsome monster. I'm still trying to figure out why I was picked to be the lucky mom of Sam. He makes me smile more than I ever thought I could. I'm probably going to need some botox because of him - not to mention a few other cosmetic surgeries also thanks to him - but these laugh lines are getting deep! I said to Phil last night that it's weird that I'm a "bright side" kind of person now. I don't know when that happened but I never thought in my life I would be one of the happy shiny people. I used to be someone who thought people who were joyful, glass half full kind of people were just annoying. If you are like that, I'm sorry to let you know that I am SO proud to be annoying.

I guess we do look like daddy just a tad. Especially when we are making the same face :)